The King of Elfland's Daughter

“… she crooned now a melody like a wind in summer blowing from wild wood gardens that no man tended, down valleys loved once by children, now lost to them but for dreams, a song of such memories as lurk and hide along the edges of oblivion, now flashing from beautiful years of glimpse of some golden moment, now passing swiftly out of remembrance again, to go back to the shades of oblivion, and leaving on the mind those faintest traces of little shining feet which when dimly perceived by us are called regrets..."

 

~~~~

 

“The King of Elfands Daughter” is a fantasy story first published by Lord Dunsany back in 1924. It inspired Neil Gaiman, to the point that he wrote the introduction to Del Rey's 1999 publication of the novel. In it Gaiman praises the beauty of the writing,  it’s honest portrayal of magic's repercussions in the non-magic world, and how a tale full of magic somehow manages to keep “its feet well planted on the ground”. At it’s end he states“Perhaps this book should come with a warning: it is not a reassuring, by-the-numbers fantasy novel … This is the real thing. It is a rich red wine..." He encourages all to "Trust the book. Trust the poetry and the strangeness, and the magic of the ink, and drink it slowly.” This intro was included in Gaiman’s “The View from the Cheap Seats”, which is how I learned of this golden tale and after a description such as that how could I not seek this book out? I now add that piece to the long, twirling list of reasons why I am grateful for Neil Gaiman.

For from the story's first page dedication “To Lady Dunsany” to the final shining page of magic, this book has charmed me entirely and completely. It is a story about life and hope and dreams. A cautionary tale to be careful what you wish for. It rings with true love, the loss of it, and the timeless pursuit to find it once more. It is the genuine fairy tale, one seeped with magic and unicorns and a mischievous troll called Lurulu. The story alone would be enough to captivate, but Lord Dunsany's use of writing is so rich with magnificent wonder, he has made it impossible to not become lost inside it forever. Every sentence is poetry, sung into story form. Every page made more beautiful by the magic each individual word holds and the dreams that they together invoke.

In short,  “The King of Elflands Daughter” is full of people and places that I have fallen utterly, absolutely in love with. It is a treasure of the truest kind and one I could not recommend strongly enough.

Aftermath

Shocked. Horrified. Incredibly saddened. I am struggling so hard right now to accept what this country has just done. Grasping to make sense of the hate so many people have allowed to take over their hearts for them to choose as they have. It makes me wish I wasn't part of this species called human, that I was a "lesser" animal instead. Sure they hunt, they cause pain, they kill; but at least with them it's due to instinct and survival and that is so much better than hatred. How can America be great when hatred is it's foundation?

 

As a woman I feel my worth and importance has been diminished. I can actually sense - for the first time ever - that thick bulletproof glass ceiling hovering just inches above my head, waiting to knock me down should I dare jump to high. I walked outside this morning - it blocked out the stars, sitting by my desk now - still there, laying in my bed last night- it was suffocating. How long will it last, will it ever fully fade?

 

Driving to work this morning on a four lane highway bogged down with traffic, hearing the promise of pollution in the air quality report, I looked at the future and felt cold fear twisting my stomach. It's still there, I expect it to be there, celebrating it's cruel victory, for a long time to come. I can barely take a breath without the threat of tears and I believe that it will be years before a true deep breath of comfort and safety will fill my lungs again. I am terrified for this country.

 

I wish, so very much that I could escape this world. I don't know how to process this new reality, don't know how to imagine a country where this is possible, much less live in it. I don't even know how to think anymore. I just don't know.

Loss

“It is one of my personal beliefs that when you miss someone you can find them in the mountains”

Synge is gone.

Friday went about as well as could be expected for all that was involved. She had a really good last day. There was much scrambling of eggs and opening of tuna cans. I curled up with her when she wanted me to and just sat beside her on the kitchen floor (her preferred spot) when she didn’t. For a bit Faelina even snuggled up next to her and fell asleep; I hadn’t seen them together like that for a while and it warmed my troubled heart to be able to see it one last time. And outside influences aside, she seemed to be much more content than I’d witnessed for weeks.

I held up fairly well. When I was home with her I managed to stay fairly calm with only a few teary eyed moments. But around noon I had to go into work, when I gave her a goodbye kiss I lost it and cried the whole way to Benchmark. I managed to pull myself together and arrived home a couple hours later with clear eyes. At that point our time together was down to mere hours. I fed her more of her favorites and then just sat, stroking her silky soft fur until Steph showed up. With Steph driving I decided to forgo the cat kennel; I didn’t want her to be stressed. Instead I wrapped her up in her favorite purple blanket, told her we were going on one last adventure and then held her in my lap as we drove off. An hour later she was gone.

As I pulled myself back into Steph’s van after I was drained, empty. I had no idea what to do or say. I was struggling to process what new reality the world had just become. I’m so grateful that Stephanie was able to come with me, was there, because not only did she keep me from having to do this impossibly hard thing alone, she knew what to say after to give me comfort and something to hold onto.  She said “It is one of my personal beliefs that when you miss someone you can find them in the mountains”. She said when we lose someone that is where they always go. They seek out a spot that is peaceful and quiet and wait for you to come find them. I stared up at the mountains the whole way home.

Yesterday I went up to Adams Canyon. It was my first hike in a week and I rejoiced in the hard climb that led me up into the mountain. At a spot a few minutes away from the waterfall I stopped.  There I sat, looking through the trees and over the rocks. I could envision her – whole, happy, and healthy – slinking through the underbrush and peeking down from a rock high above me. I could almost feel her curled up in my arms.

I miss her so much but now I know that she’s not gone for good. She’s just up in the mountains, curled up sleeping in the quiet spaces, waiting for me to come find her.  

 

French Doors, Mountain Falls, Harry Potter and Eggs

It's been awhile, just past a month. My lack of posts aren't due to a sudden loss of interest in writing; rather it's that almost the second I landed in the US, my days were transformed into a frenzied whirlwind of busyness, so much so that I have a hard time catching my breath at times, much less writing. For the most part this fall has been a sparkling waterfall of happiness, but just recently that waterfall grew darker with one sliver of icy sadness. So what has been happening? Well....

To start off I finally, after almost a year in Utah, have moved into my own place! It's a little two bedroom, two bathroom mobile home on Main st. in Layton. It could not be more different from my Brunswick apartment. In some ways it’s a wonderful dissimilarity (I have more space, much nicer features and fixtures, I’ll be warmer in the winter), but in others I’m filled with nostalgic sadness as I remember the charm and history of my old place that just cannot be recreated. And Layton's Main street, well, let's just say it's not my favorite, especially when I look back on the bustling magic of Brunswick’s. Still, I love my new little home. I love the freedom of having my own time and space back. I love the quietness. I have very little in the way of furniture and I honestly love that, the lack of stuff makes my whole life feel less cluttered. My favorite part of the whole place is my master bathroom, more specifically the French doors that open up into it. They add a touch of luxurious glamour to life that I quite enjoy. The rest of the bathroom is pretty great too, like amazing, especially when compared to my old place (those of you in the know will remember how much that bathroom needed help). And since I don't have a need for an actual second bedroom, I am in the process of turning that second room into my very own ….. LIBRARY!! Seriously a dream come true! That could take another month or two though as I’ve been slowly, meanderingly making my way through all my possessions to get everything arranged and where I want it to be. Part of that can be chalked up to my own indecision of what I actually do want but mostly it's because I've been spending a lot of my free time out wandering up mountain canyons.

My visit to Norway was amazing in thousands of ways. One of the biggest was that every day without exception, I was outside. My lungs, skin and mind were awarded constant access to fresh air and I ended my trip rejuvenated and refreshed to so great a degree that I realized just how much my lack of outdoor adventures in Utah was negatively affecting me. As I sat on the plane back to the US I vowed to change, promised myself explore more. Thankfully it hasn’t been that hard of a promise to keep. There is a hiking trail close to home that follows the river of Adams Canyon up a glorious waterfall. It's a tough hike, especially the first little bit (someone described it once as trying to run on the beach - uphill), but spectacularly beautiful. I’ve been going about 3-4 times a week; most days I just go a short ways up the trail before turning around, but at least once a week I’ll dash my way up to the waterfall (and by dash I mean very slowly trudge up the sandy hills and rocky paths). Always, without fail I return to my car - and life - with a relaxed and happy soul, ready to take on the world. My hope is to soon find other trails to wander down, maybe find another waterfall or two.  

There have also been a few other things keeping me preoccupied, the two best being Harry Potter and Neil Gaiman. I’ll start with Potter first. Back in April (at least I think it was April), Steph and I went on a hike. We had a fabulous time and talked about many things, one of which was throwing several theme parties for the kids over the summer. We had lots of ideas and picked three, the best of which (in my humble opinion) was a Harry Potter party. We planned this one for last and at the time our scheduled date seemed so far away I felt it’d never come.  But come it did, last Saturday, October 15^th when the boys and Faith woke up to find Hogwarts acceptance letters (their first thought was a trip to Universal Studios in CA, which gave me a bit of guilt). They were given Harry Potter glasses to don and then sat beneath floating candles to be sorted – by the actual Sorting Hat from the movies – into their houses (we had two Gryffindor’s, two Hufflepuffs, and a Slytherin!). They picked and painted wands, played Quidditch with a slightly different set of rules than the books, and had their fortunes told with a crystal ball! They indulged on treats of chocolate frogs, licorice wands, cauldron cakes, Droobels Best Blowing Gum, and Butterbeer. It was fun, laughter filled hilarity and I was so psyched throughout every single second of it!

Neil Gaiman’s turn now. This man is my absolute favorite living author (Charlotte Bronte still remains my all-time favorite) and earlier this year he published a new book “The View from the Cheap Seats”. It’s a compilation of essays, speeches, introductions etc… that he has written over the last few decades. The Granades, incredible friends that they are, and knowing just how big a fan I am, gifted me this book for my birthday. A couple weeks ago, after finishing “The Prisoner of Heaven” by Carlos Ruiz Zafon (someday I’m going to have to share just how much I love him too), my eyes fell upon the cover of Gaiman’s book and the time just felt right for me to read it. At first I was a little skeptical on whether I’d enjoy it as much as I have all his other works, because it was non-fiction, a genre that tends to be a little more difficult for me to fall into. A few essays in I felt as though I’d walked through the gates of literary heaven and was surprised at just how much fun this book was to read because, again, non-fiction. Then I realized that I’d been an idiot from the start because it was Neil Gaiman who wrote everything, so obviously it would have pulled me into it’s spell, just like everything else he has done. Now, with fewer than 40 pages to read (out of 502) my feelings towards this book have only grown more positive. I got to learn his insights on his approach the art of storytelling; was told just how strongly he believes in the importance of books and reading. I discovered which authors, artists and musicians inspired him growing up, and which of those still wow him today. The passion in his words has instantly jumped them all at the top of my “To Read” list, and I can’t wait to get started! Neil Gaiman is a magical genius and I swear that each time he picks up a pen to write the page he touches turns to pure gold. For anyone who loves Neil Gaiman novels, for all of you who dream about writing yourselves, I cannot recommend this book strongly enough!

And now I come to the icy sliver of sadness I mentioned earlier, Synge. I’ll start first some upbeat news. Faelina, I’m happy to report is thrilled beyond meows to have a new place to create havoc in. She gallops the length of the house several times day, chasing every light, shadow and (to me) invisible creature that catches her eye. She pulls towels down from the hooks delightedly, jumps onto the kitchen counters with impossible glee (because she knows how much I hate that), peeks into the oven with devious curiosity, guards the window with pride, and when all that's done collapses in happy exhaustion upon whatever spot feels comfortable to her at the time. In short, she is back to her little sparkly fairy self (sometimes with a touch of demon thrown in).  It breaks my heart to say that Synge's story has not read well.

During our first few weeks at the house she did seem much more content. She had lost a little weight while I was gone but an increase in insulin and (at the vet's suggestion) the addition of a nightly scrambled egg seemed to be helping. But last weekend I looked at her and saw a change; one that was stark and severe and made my heart grow cold. She'd lost more weight (even though all she does it seems is eat), she wasn’t grooming herself; each footstep she took shook, and she sometimes stumbled when standing up. I thought through this with fear. I picked up the phone and asked my mom for advice. I drove to the clinic after work to talk with the vet. I cried, a lot. At the end of it all, I made an appointment for this Friday and, barring a much needed miracle of sudden health, that is when I will wrap her in my arms, give her one final kiss and let her slip into peace.

It’s a situation that sucks. It’s the worst, crummiest part of pet ownership. It’s knowing what you have to do but still questioning, second guessing everything you know to be the right thing because you so badly, desperately, ache to be wrong. Synge has been with me through so much, was my comfort in every struggle for 10 years, and the idea of not having her with me hurts like a razor sharp, bone crushing hell. But it's not about me anymore; it's about her and what she needs. My mom helped me come to the conclusion that I owe it to her to let her go with some dignity, to not wait until she is in constant discomfort. So this is what I must do.

My goal will be to spoil her as much as possible this week. Outside of work I’ll be sticking fairly close to home and I’ll take most of Friday off work. She’s getting extra scrambled eggs every night and lots of canned food and tuna fish, something she has shown great enthusiasm for. I brush her every night because I can tell it’s one of the few things that still bring her pleasure. I’m very sad. My whole body just wants to break down and cry. I feel like I’ve let her down because I couldn’t keep her healthy (I know it’s not true but that doesn’t change anything). Again though it’s not about me, it’s about Synge. Even if I haven’t let her down, I will be if I keep her alive to make life easier for me.

So yeah, that’s where I’m at in life. Obviously for the next few weeks life will be covered with a tinge of blue, understandable I think. I’ll focus on keeping busy. I should be able to; after all I still have a house to set up, mountains to find, and a whole new reading list to dive into. And I like to believe, hope, that Synge will still be with me, even if it’s no longer in this physical realm. She has without doubt been the best cat; I am so grateful that of all the people in this world she chose me to be her person.
 

Farvel for Nå

I find myself once more on the eve of yet another incredible Norwegian adventure. How do I feel about this? There are thousand ways I could answer but they would all boil down to one thing - I don't want to leave. My heart is screaming at me to NOT set foot onto my return plane, it's begging me to stay. I feel like I'm leaving Alaska an act that, as I've written in the past, I do not handle well. I wish a move to Norway were just as simple as just packing up my stuff, putting myself and the cats on a plane, and then figuring out the rest from once I landed. Unfortunately switching countries is a touch trickier than switching states, otherwise I'd be doing that exact thing right now.

There was quite a bit on this trip that the was same as last year - the house, the pets (albeit with a few more health issues), my favorite haunts in the Stavanger Sentrum, the old candle factory, the walking trails by the house, the need to be outside as much as possible, and of course the jaw dropping beauty that is everything Norway. There were differences too though that gave this particular experience it's own unique flavor....

After the initial jolt I got my first night with the sun actually setting and black night taking over; I enjoyed the way Stavanger's city lights shone through the darkness. I LOVED that I got to see a golden moon rising so many nights in a row. Last year my raincoat was pretty much a daily necessity, this time around it's the sun that has reigned. I remember how much the airs dryness delighted me last July but now, after living in a desert for a year, I am acutely aware of the moisture in the air and it's silky softness sets me smiling. The presence of bugs has been noticed a bit more this time too, of course last year they were so rare they were almost invisible so this change has only been the tiniest of tiny nuisances. The best changes though were the new places I got to add to my life story - Store Stokkavatn, Hålandsvatnet, Tungenes lighthouse, stepping inside the Domkirke, Vårlivarden, Helleren, Bjørndalsfjellet ,and of course the beyond beautiful Viglesdalen.

But with so many things in land that I still want to do - need to do; when there are so many hidden treasures my heart still has yet to discover;  how can I go when I do know when, or even if, I'll ever be back. My friends move back to Alaska this month, which means that there will be no future incredible, too good to be true housesitting opportunities. If I want to come back it's on me to make it happen. So I guess I have a new project to work on because, well, I have to come back I don't really have a choice. Just like Alaska, Norway has imprinted itself upon my soul, so whether it takes me six months or six years I will one day return. For now, Norway, takk for turen, til vir møtes igjen!

~

Viglesdalen

Katy came home Sunday afternoon so that she could see the pets, get some laundry done and run a few errands before she and Joe flew off to their next adventure this morning (Joe went to Oslo to check out the 'big city'). She told me that since she'd be home all day Monday I was free to take off, to be gone all day, basically to do whatever I wanted to do. The first thing I did was head to the website of Outdoorlife Norway. Since my Kjerag hiking experience with that company had been so sensational last year I was eager to see if another would be possible. Sadly Monday was either his day off or the hike scheduled for the day was already full because nothing was available. So sent me back to the planning drawing board which was basically two main questions. Did I want to go for a long drive to see some place I otherwise wouldn't be able to - a Stave Church would be really cool - or did I want to go for a long hike. Katy recommended Viglesdalen, a hike in the Hjelmeland area that she really loved which sparked my memory into recalling another hike in that region that my Outdoorlife Norway guide had recommended - Reinaknuten. I decided to shoot for Reinaknuten and was on the road early with coffee in hand, hiking gear in the passenger seat beside me, excited for my adventure.

Well the good news - I couldn't find the trailhead for Reinaknuten. I say good news because if I had then I never would have never hiked Viglesdalen and Viglesdalen is holy god, super fantastic, absolutely AMAZING!!! (And FYI, I'm not the only one who couldn't find Reinaknuten, Katy's tried 3 times with no success).

The trail starts in a parking lot of the small, tiny town Nes. The first few minutes had me walking through a small farm full of sheep before veering upwards into a rocky forest. There are a lot of rocks on this hike, almost non-stop rocks, but there are very few parts that have you going up a steep incline so I rarely felt the precarious fear that one misstep could send me sliding down into disaster.

Also on the first half of the trail there is a fair amount of water i.e. puddles, fairy rivers etc... but again since I was moving up into the mountains so gradually it didn't really bother me too much because the trail was laced with mind blowing, drop dead gorgeous waterfalls. There were small waterfalls that barely were higher than my head, then tall thin waterfalls that started way up at the mountains top, and then there were the waterfalls - Sendingsfossen, Hiafossen and Granefossen - that roared down the center of the valley and had me stopping for pictures every few seconds because each new step had me thinking I couldn't possible see a more beautiful sight only to be disproven a few seconds later with the next step. Those waterfalls alone would have made the whole hike worth it but, unbelievably, the best part was yet to come!

I left the falls behind about an hour and a half in and shortly after came to a stone bridge hanging over the, now quiet, river that looked so much like something out of a fairytale that I could envision rolls crossing over heading to their kingdom. After crossing it myself however, I saw a small sign The bridge was built to make it easier for the farmers of Viglesdalen to herd their sheep. It's first stones were laid by Swedish laborers in 1907 and they completed it at last in 1912. Prior to the bridge the sheep herders had to cross the lake by boat in order to reach their sheep, an undertaking that was precarious at best. In 1874 a boat capsized drowning the four shepherd and nine year old girl who had been on board. After this particular event the Viglesdalen became known as a "spooky place". It was ultimately abandoned in 1883 with the farmers heading down the valley into Nes.
sharing the bridges true story.

Soon after the bridge I got a tricky glimpse of the buildings that were my ultimate destination. I say tricky because it took a good hour of hiking before I would actually reach them. The trail then turned into a sprawl of rock screes that sang of avalanche possibilities on my left. I was to busy though paying attention to the lovely blue waters of the lake and tall dark canyon walls on my right to be too nervous about my left. Finally I stepped out the rocks and into a huge grassy meadow with five red buildings a few hundred feet in front of me. The valley was quiet, the breeze soft, the sun shining sweetly. I was mesmerized by the calm beauty that encircled me and was filled with a calm deeper than I could have ever imagined.

I walked forwards towards the structures, loving the Norwegian charm of their grass covered roofs and dark wood doors. The first two buildings were locked but a small gate let me into the enclosure of the other three, the ones that are open to the public. All along the valleys and mountains of Norway are cabins that the country's trekking association maintains for it's hikers. They are furnished with beds and blankets, chairs and tables, dishes for cooking/eating, and food to eat.

There is chopped firewood for heat and signs directing you to the nearest source of water. The cabins are left open year round and anyone is able to stop and stay a night or two. Before they leave the guests will complete a form with their information and slip it into a locked box so that the association can note who was there and charge them for their stay. It's a system that has been in place for decades and - largely thanks to Norwegian's honesty - it works. The cabin at Viglesdalen is the associations oldest, first established in 1931 it was built upon the foundation of one of the farms abandoned structures. There is actually a second cabin (in case there's a lot of hikers in one night) and a separate building for the outhouse.

I was absolutely in love with the cabin and enchanted with the idea of staying there. In theory I could have hiked out Sunday night and done just that and I'm still kicking myself for letting that opportunity slip away. Who knows, maybe someday.

Hikers have the option of continuing past Viglesdalen to what I'm sure are more magnificent, magical surroundings. I wanted to go down that trail, I never wanted to turn back. But just the trip to the cabins was 7 kilometers and 3 hours; I knew that it was time for me to return to the car and reality. The journey back was a repeat of what I've just describe. It was beyond enchanting and by the time my footsteps hit the Nes parking lot I was completely and utterly in love. And the whole time I was on the trail - a full six hours - I didn't see a single person, it was just the icing on the cake to a perfect adventure. I have found my Norwegian Eagle River Nature Center. It is a place I will dream of always, a valley that will fill my dreams until I can one day return.

I decided to head north for one other quick excursion (which I'll write about another time) before heading back down Route 13 towards home. In my rearview mirror I could see the sun saying goodbye as right in front of me the moon rose over indigo mountains. It was the biggest moon I think I have ever seen in my life, the perfect end to a perfect day.

~

A Week of Wonder

I can't believe I have already been in Stavanger for a week. The past seven days have been magnificent and if I had it my way these next seven days would turn into seven years. I never want to leave! When I left Utah for Norway I had the assumption that my time here would be spent mostly at the house with a few 1-2 hour adventures close by. When I got here though my friends told me that I while I couldn't take off for an entire day of hiking I did have a bit more flexibility with time than I'd assumed. This means that short hikes nearby are in and I'm even able to take some drives to old favorites (see Tuesday's post about Byrkjedalstunet) and possible find a few new ones. Here are some of the things I've been up to this past week.... 

Monday - Store Stokkavatn

The description in the Stavanger tourist book is as follows "Stavanger's largest lake, Store Stokkavatn, is situated approx. 2,5 km west of the town center. It once supplied much of the town's drinking water, but in recent years has been replaced by other sources, with facilities now being on standby."

This was one both Katy and Joe recommended as a great place to for a nice and easy walk in the fresh air. They were right! The approximately 8km path is wide, paved, and fairly even. The lake is constantly by you on one side with houses, parks, and golf courses your view on the other (just FYI I didn't see a single golf cart, all the golfers walked). I had gone this past Monday, a day that was quite sunny and warm, but there is enough in the way of tall trees offering shade to keep you comfortable throughout the walk.

Just before the lakes halfway point I came across a small wooden building perched just net to a small brook. There was a sign posted on a tree close by and I stood trying to make sense of the Norwegian words on it when I heard a voice behind me. I turned to find an old man whose face was remarkable similar to the one a picture on that tree trunk sign. It turned out that's because they were one and the same and the old man was in charge of the building which he explained was an ancient corn mill from the 1800s. He had just finished locking it up (he'd been giving a demonstration to some school kids) but he opened the door once more to let me look inside and see how things worked. I would attempt to describe it all but am pretty sure I would bungle it so much even I'd be confused so please just take me at my word when I say it's really cool and I'm very grateful to that man for taking time to show me.

~

Wednesday - Dalsnuten

Dalsnuten was my first Norwegian hike last year and I like the symmetry of it being my first this time as well. Last year the sun shown like a diamond and the trail was full of numerous hikers and sheep alike, not so much this Wednesday with the sun playing a never ending game of hide and seek behind gray clouds and few hikers were around (I only saw a couple sheep way off in the distance). I almost preferred it that way though. The few hikers I did pass put me to shame since they were either a) RUNNING up the mountain or b) outstripping me so fast they could have been running - and most appeared a bit older than me. When I did reach the summit the view blew me away just like last time. I stood for a few minutes, gazing at the sights surrounding me before guiding my footsteps back down the mountain, with a happy heart as it breathed in fresh mountain air.

~

Thursday - Helleren

I decided to take it easy on Thursday and go for a drive. I headed south towards Egersund and the Sokndal region. It was not a short trip but throughout it's entirety the sights surrounding me enchanted. At times they were pure European wonder,  at others the woods met fairytale promises, and in one or two spots there was even a hint of the road I used to take back in Maine on Sundays when I'd drive to Grafton Notch or White Mountain National Forest for a hike. At last after many twists and turns, ups and downs, and many quietly whispered "wow"s, I reached my intended destination - Helleren.

These are two houses rest beneath a huge rock overhang that has provided them with shelter since the early 1800s. So great is the protection of the mountain that the houses do not even have proper roofs - it was never needed. The last families to call these two structures home left in the 1920s, but the country has preserved them as an important reminder of Norwegian history. While clearly not livable, the houses are in remarkable condition. I say remarkable because they are open at any time, on any day, to anyone who wants to visit. There are no visitor hours, no guards, no locks; there is just a country that trusts visitors will carefully wander through without causing any damage. The red house was closed for repairs - primarily the steps leading up to the door were no longer safe for a humans weight. The blue house was open and when I opened that door I stepped back in time. My steps echoed with the history of the lives who had lived there, cooked food in the large pot on the fire, discussed farm chores in the small front room, and slept in the bedroom upstairs (I peeked in there but didn't feel super secure in the stability of the floor so I didn't stay long). It was a magnificent experience to have such a clear picture of what life was like back in those days.

My drive to Helleren had taken me a little longer than Google Maps had promised me so I didn't do much dallying on the way back as I wanted to get the dogs their lunch on time. I did though pull into a (free!) parking lot in Egersund and speed (on foot) towards Sjokoladehjorna A/S, one of the towns two chocolate factories. I had visited this place last year but been too afraid to let myself taste anything, not this year I decided. I picked out a truffle and took an Americano takeaway. My truffle of choice was a dark chocolate shell with a smooth and creamy mint filling that practically sparkled on the tongue and put to shame every mint truffle I've had up to now. The Americano wasn't that bad either!

~

Friday - Fjogstadnuten

My second hike of the trip took place yesterday at Fjogstadnuten. The first kilometer of this trail is actually the same as Dalsnuten. It's not quite as high as Dalsnuten - 295moh vs 323moh - and the trail is a bit longer. These two factors combined make for a less steep, fairly easy climb to the summit, I was almost never out of breath. The sun was out in greater force but a constant breeze helped keep me cool. This trail is not quite as popular as Dalsnuten and I only met a couple of people along the way; no runners this time which helped me not feel quite so pathetic! Overall it was a short, pleasant jaunt in the wilds of Norway that I would most definitely recommend to anyone. When I reached the parking lot afterwards I saw a fairly old man (I'd guess late 80s) just hanging out in a little motorized wheelchair. He was talking to a few other people so I assumed that it was him but then saw him break off and head down the very steep road I had driven up to get to said parking lot. I passed him a little bit later and saw a smile on his face as I passed, the perfect example of Norwegians' toughness and love for the 'friluftsliv'!

~

No big adventure today. The weather was full of rain, rain and more rain, so I spent the morning shopping in Sandnes and the afternoon walking around Stavanger where I finally got to step inside the doors of the Stavanger Domkirke! I haven't decided yet what I'm doing tomorrow much less the rest of the week but I have not doubt that it'll be amazing. Well of course it will be, I'm in Norway!

Roadtrips, "Running" and Birthdays!

I woke up this morning to a grayer sky than I've been living with the past couple days. While a gray sky in Norway is never a good excuse to nix any outdoor plans, I just wasn't feeling the activities I'd originally planned for the day. So after pet care, coffee and breakfast - in that order - I darted out to the car and steered my way towards Highway 44 and the route that would take me to one of my favorite places from last year, Byrkjedalstunet. It is a drive that can never be less than breathtaking, no matter if the sky is full of sparkling sun or billowy, crying clouds. I think I could drive it every day and never grow tired of it's quiet beauty. Never grow tired of it mentally/emotionally that is, for by the time I turned into the parking lot of my destination I was physically beginning to lag. I pursued the gift shop/candle factory for a bit before walking next door to the hotel restaurant for a coffee. I could have taken my elixir of life to go (they call it "takeaway" here!) but chose instead to sit for a bit and enjoy the quiet bustling of the kitchen and the near emptiness (it was always super crowded last summer) of the restaurant.

When I was finally ready to leave I decided to take an alternate road back, one that would lead me

through Gloppedalsura, an area of fallen avalanche boulders, remnants of an ice sheet that covered the area 10,000 years ago. While I did not appreciate the very narrow one lane road (meant for cars going both ways) that at times seemed to have me simultaneously clinging to the mountainside and a half second away from falling into the lake, the boulders were definitely a sight to behold. The many valleys, rivers, and lakes I passed through afterwards just as lovely as those I'd come across on my earlier drive. Overall I was very pleased with that last minute decision.

By the time I arrived back at the house the sky had become darker and the rainfall more frequent so I decided to stick close to home the rest of the day. I did feel the need for some fresh air though and so attempted to emulate a tough Norwegian (seriously Norwegians make Alaskans look like wimps) by going out for a quick run. Quick being the key word there, I lasted 2 minutes before needing to stop. Being out in the cool air felt so rejuvenating and wonderful though so I did continue walking for a bit before turning around. I walked into the front door with wet hair and a happy spirit, so in love with this country I can't even begin to put it into words.

There is one other thing today that makes me happy. Today a little girl, my best friends daughter, turns 3 years old! I remember when Steph first called me to say she was pregnant. I remember the nervous excitement I felt when I found out the baby was a girl (I was so worried the doctors got it wrong). I remember the very first time I saw her, sleeping in her moms arms just over a month after she was born. Getting to know her fierce little spirit over the last year has been a true, absolute joy. I'm sorry that I'm not able to celebrate her birthday with her but am definitely there in spirit. And until get back and can present her with her real birthday present, here's a few short phrases to show just how happy I am that she's here.

She's being 'kissed' by faeries and sprinkles in the hair,

She's sassy independence singing Frozen everywhere

She's giggles full of glee over Shirley Temple curls,

She's sparkling matching jelly shoes on outings with the girls

She's a princess and a tomboy and Wonder Woman too,

She's chasing bubbles with delight around the living room

She's trouble when she wants to be, she's her mamma's favorite girl,

She's filled with magic happiness, dancing through the world

Happy Birthday Faith!

~

Happy in Norway

First full day in Norway and it has been heaven! My friends drove off on a roadtrip this morning leaving me with a house all to myself for at least the next three day until their return (they'll be home for a couple days then fly out to Paris!). It's been barely 12 hours and I'm already more relaxed and calm than I've been in months.

I took it fairly easy today, decided that even though I missed the jet lag bus again (thank goodness) my body would probably prefer short outings with resting breaks in between. It was gorgeous weather though and I wanted to be outside, so I drove over to Sverd i Fjell and walked the path that follows Hapsfjorden for a time basking in the sun. When I got home I grabbed my book and drove south along the windy, narrow roads looking for Borrstranden, one of my favorite discoveries from last time. It was slightly more crowded than on my first visit, but still remains one of the most beautiful beaches I've ever experienced. I stepped through the waves all the way to the beach's end then turned, pulled out Harry Potter and the Cursed Child and read my way back as the wind blew through my hair and the sand covered my feet. I finished just as I reached the car; really there is no better way to finish the first day of a trip.

Excited for the place I am in. Happy in the knowledge that I am completely alone. Ready for whatever tomorrow will bring!

Traveling Happiness

Just over a year after my original return, I once more find myself on the eve of another Norwegian adventure. My bags are packed (I think), and I am ready (I hope) for the long plane rides (10hrs then 2 1/2) that will fly me back to that magical land.

I have made no plans this time, have no secret hiking goals. Will I re-discover the cobblestone streets of Stavanger? Very likely. Will I re-visit my favorite walking route by the house and say hello to the milk cows as I pass? Almost assuredly. Will I step barefoot through the sand of the pristine beaches, shivering as the ocean waves splash over my toes? I certainly hope so. But even if I don't, even if I do nothing and end up stuck inside the house the whole two weeks I wouldn't care. When I called Norway a magical land, well, I wasn't just saying that. It is magic, old magic, the kind of magic that connects you with the spirit of the earth and the core of your soul. Being there gave me a peace and strength that followed me back to the states and helped give me the drive and courage needed to say goodbye to Maine and drive west to Utah. I wonder what it will help me with this time around? I guess I'll find out, soon. I am so, so grateful that the universe has seen fit to give me this incredible opportunity - again.

And with that I'm off to chase dreams, seek adventure, and find my dragon!

Mending

"If things are going untowardly one month, they are sure to mend the next!" ~ Jane Austin

This past week I've opened my eyes each morning to find a world a thousand times brighter than the one I'd been existing in since July 5th. It appears that my lifelong rollercoaster has finally reached the bottom of that particular plummeting crash and is more starting to climb into a dazzling blue sky.

To address some of the issues I listed in my post on Missing Home; for the most part I'm back to sleeping better. It's now rare for me to have a night of lying in bed hours after the sun has set with a mind that racing, refusing to let dreams soothe me. I do still have nights where I fall asleep fast and stay that way but wake up feeling as though I've run a marathon in the midnight hours. I don't have an explanation for that, the only thing I can think of is bad dreams. Hopefully that will pass. Work is as crazy as ever, but boring it now is not and the stress level has, maybe, eased down a notch (or maybe I've just adjusted to it!). I'll take that and be grateful, especially since there are a few people I work with who are truly awesome. Synge was for awhile continuing to head downhill both in weight and overall health. After more vet visits and bloodwork it (fingers crossed!) seems we might finally have her on the regime she needs. She even gained some weight last week!! My frenzied apartment hunt is now over, but that is all you will hear on that subject for a bit, at least until I return from Norway - which I am thrilled to report is finally happening!!! 

It will be a very different trip this time and not just because it's only two weeks instead of four. My friends dogs has stabilized but is still far from stellar health and continues to require a lot of care and attention. This means that hiking is not an option; surprisingly though I'm only mildly disappointed. Don't get me wrong, I would have loved to go revisit some of the trails I explored last summer, and maybe even head down a new path or two, but the hikes I really wanted to do I did last summer. I have those memories and that will be enough for now. Besides, I'll have beaches to hang out on, the city to keep me busy, and - for when I really need to just move - the hundreds of walking trails that live just outside my friends front door. I think I'll love this trip just as much, it will just be a different kind of amazing.

There is one  thing that hasn't changed. I still miss Alaska, so much so that every breath I take still hovers around the edge of physical pain. But that has always been the case , it always will be, as long as I'm away. That I have learned to handle to breath through as long as other aspects of daily life are bearable, which they are. I've even had a bit of fun when yesterday Steph, her parents, the kids and I took on the Utah Renaissance Faire at Thanksgiving Point.

We cheered the Knights of Mayhem jousting, got lost in the spell of gypsies dancing, fell into joy at the sight of the sparkling Elven Fae, and bowed to Queen Elizabeth I herself. Even Captain Jack Sparrow made an appearance atop a pirate ship, both bringing much delight to adults and kids alike. We will definitely be back next year, only this time we will have costumes. Steph and I have decided that we would like to be Gypsy Faery Mermaids (I forgot to mention there were mermaids too!), a costume I think will find no better candidate, because at heart we already are all of these!

~~~~

Friday Poem

 

 

Happy Friday all! I just have a short little poem for the end of the week. I can't pinpoint any specific source of inspiration behind it, it simply floated into my head as I was driving home from work yesterday. Have a beautiful weekend :)

 



 

Deep in the heart of the woods at midnight,

Wildfires dance, faeries delight

Beneath night skies of diamond snow,

Their magic enchants, it haunts your soul

 

With fluttering laughter fueled by phoenix flames,

they spin dark fireworks, weave silver chains,

Hovering they wait for their spells to take hold,

then grasp your fingers, never let you go

~~~~~

 



One Fun Adventure and a Simple Poem

 No long post this week, just a fun adventure to share and a small poem. First the adventure; Farmington, Utah is home to an amusement park called Lagoon. The park has brought joy and excitement to Utahans and tourists alike since first opening it's 'doors' back in 1886, and visitors today can still enjoy the Victorian Carosaul that debuted in 1906 and the rickety wooden roller coaster that first thrilled riders back in 1921. To visit today costs a pretty penny ($50+), but once a year Stephanie's dad gets a screaming good deal on tickets ($5.00) from the company he once worked for. This year, that one day was yesterday, and I was lucky enough to go along.It was a blast!

It's been years since I've been on any ride scarier than a ferris wheel (which I do feel compelled to say does not scare me) and I have never been on a roller coaster - or any ride for that matter - that would spin me completely upside down. Well, that changed fast. I broke in the day on that rickety old roller coaster, got whipped around a twisty ride called Wild Mouse, and then went upside down, not just once but twice, on Colossus the Fire Dragon. My favorite ride though was not anything wild or crazy, it was the swings; the swings that raise you up high in the air and spin you around so you feel like you're flying. High on that swing I felt I was in heaven and could have happily stayed there until long after the sun had set.

And now a little poem I just began working on, inspired by the real Faery music I've been listening to all day...

Faeries flutter their diamond wings,

chanting soft music, enchanting my dreams

Beckoning gently they turn toward home,

with elysian beauty no mortal can know...

I long to discover what strange secrets they hold,

witness the wisdom of those ethereal souls

So I pursue on tiptoe their diaphanous wings,

forever to walk in this numinous dream

~~~~

Missing Home

A few weeks ago I was high on life and happiness. I went home. I was surrounded by my mom, sisters, and brother-in-laws. I held my two perfect, amazing, incredible nephews. I breathed the Alaskan mountain air and walked in the midnight summer sun. Then I returned to Utah and crashed into despair. To put it briefly:

- I'm haven't been sleeping well, at all
- Synge almost died from an insulin overdose (thankfully we've now got that all figured out)
- Work has been a weird combination of busy, boring, and stressful
- The sound system in my laptop broke
- I'm furiously looking for my own place; a depressing, discouraging, miserable process
- For the first time ever, reading is failing to bring me joy

 And I miss Alaska. Miss it so much that it sometimes hurts to breathe. I try to cope by blocking out  my emotions, which usually works, only I then become a numb, zoned-out, zombie. Of course I can only keep that up for a few days before my feelings refuse to be supressed any longer and I turn into a tearful wreck. I've said before that Alaska is the only place that I am complete, whole. And leaving, whether by choice or not, causes damage. On July 4th, when I stepped onto the red-eye flight destined for Utah I shattered. I haven't even begun put the pieces back together because I'm still trying to gather them all up, only I know I never will because half of them are floating in the Alaskan wind and only returning to Alaska is the only way I will ever find them.

When I first left Alaska five years ago, I promised myself I'd spend at least 10 years out exploring before going back; I think now I may have to revise that plan. Especially because of those two little babies, both growing bigger by the day. I hate not being able to hold them. I hate that I can't hug my mom and sisters. I hate that I'm missing so much of their lives.

Still, as miserable as I've been the past couple weeks, I'm not quite ready to give up on Utah. I know there are thousands of fun, vibrant experiences just waiting for me to step outside and discover them.It may not be my forever home but I do want to see if I can fall in love with it the same way I did Maine. I need to find my own apartment though. I did tour one Friday that I loved, really it would be perfect, but I'm too nervous and worried about how many other people may have applied to believe I'll actually get it. I'll keep my fingers crossed until I know one way or the other.

There have been a few bright gems since I've returned; diamonds in a storm that have helped me to remember life really isn't all that bad...I have gotten TWO birthday boxes from Maine friends filled with things I love beyond words. Steph and I threw a surprise Rainbow party for her kids a couple weeks ago full of fruit rainbows, skittles of all colors, tye-dye shirts, and a one of a kind canvas painting - it was an absolute blast! This past Tuesday, Benchmark held a Carnival day for the boys; we got a dunk tank, a bounce house obstacle course (which was AWESOME!), played water balloon baseball, face painted, and watched movies in the gym with snow cones, cotton candy, popcorn, and ice cream (scooped by yours truly) for refreshments. It was my favorite day of working there so far. And lastly, I've braved the 90+ degree temperatures to go hiking. This afternoon I wandered 30 minutes into Holbrook Canyon before ducking under some trees to a side trail that brought me to a quiet, hidden, shaded spot by the river. I spent one perfect beautiful hour there, listening to the music of the water as I put my thoughts to paper and imagining faeries were dancing about nearby.

A Letter to My Nephews

To my two darling nephews Tanner David and David William,

You are both brand new to this world, barely week has passed since you each took your first breath. I am blown away by how beautiful you both are, and with each new picture the love that began when I first learned of your existence has grown higher than the stars in the night sky. I wish more than anything that I could be in Alaska right now to celebrate your lives. I so desperately yearn to see with my own eyes your tiny fingers and toes, to feel the rise and fall of your chest as you breathe, to hear your little baby cries, to hold you in my arms and tell you how much I love you. The fact that I'm not in Alaska hurts. But this letter is not about me, it's about you two and everything I hope your lives will be.

I want you to have the best childhood. To grow up loving Disney movies, even the princess ones. Watch your favorites over and over again no matter how crazy it drives your parents! Spend birthdays happily diving into presents, cakes full of candles, and ice cream with chocolate sauce. Enjoy sticky Saturday mornings amongst huge stacks of chocolate chip pancakes drizzled with maple syrup and whip cream. I can't wait for you to discover the delicious fun of chocolate chip cookie dough and the warm delight of hot cocoa after a frozen day out in the winter woods. And, when you're older, I'll be sure to introduce you to the magical elixir that is coffee (that is if Grandma Berg hasn't beaten me to it!)! Read and listen to books on cd (if cds are still around in a few years). It will be so exciting to find out which story will be the one to captivate your imagination and unlock for you the magical infinite worlds that books hold. The best thing ever will be to see you fall under the unbreakable vow of the extraordinary, wonderful world of Harry Potter and daydream that you yourself will one day wander the halls of Hogwarts. You both have parents whose lives have been enriched by animals and my wish is that you share that love and learn early the unmatchable comfort that a purring cat and tail-wagging dog can provide.

You were born in one of the most incredible places on this planet, and I hope that you feel safe and inspired by the Alaska mountains surrounding you, but don't be afraid to search the world and discover the place where you each truly belong. Travel, have grand adventures, become wild and free at the edge of the of any ocean, and feel the old power that blows through the earth’s vast deserts. Learn how to lose yourself in the beauty of the outdoors, feel how it can both electrify and calm you, alight your passions and sooth your soul.

If you are anything like me then there will be times that living with parents can be a struggle, no matter what though, never doubt their love for you. And when the time comes that they tell you can't doing something you really, really want to do try to see through your frustrations and look for the wisdom that lies behind that decision. On the other hand, when your moms start to tell stories about your crazy Aunt Kelly keep in mind that I have stories about them too that I will happily share. Also craziness can sometimes be fun!  I hope that you are blessed with the gift of true lifelong friends who will always have your back, even when you screw up (and believe me this will happen, we all screw up) and that as you grow good health and only minor scrapes and bruises follow you.

In fact, if I had my way your lives would always be perfect and your childhood innocence would never fade. I know that's impossible though and, unfortunately, there will be times this world will throw at you horrors and sadness and pain. When that happens you might feel fear and that is completely ok. You might cry and that is ok too. There is nothing wrong with being sad or scared; what matters most is how you handle it. When those moments do come knocking  just remember to hold onto the core of who you are and breathe with courage. Stand tall with minds full of dreams and magic and bravery you will be unstoppable. And don't ever let self-doubt or cruel people make you question your worth. You are special and hold a universe of unimaginable power within your mind. It is that uniqueness that has thrown onto this world a splash of sparkle that can never be replaced by anyone or anything ever. Never, ever forget that you make this planet a better place by existing.

I have one last thing to say, something that your Grandpa Berg once wished for me, and it has never led me wrong so far. Follow Your Bliss. Explore the pathways of all your interests regardless of fear, doubt, or naysayers; and when you do stumble upon that something which sets off fireworks in your soul, chase that passion with everything you have. Do whatever it takes to follow the path of your heart because only the attainment of your own personal destiny will make you truly happy.

The words in this letter are only a tiny snowflake in the Arctic tundra of what I wish for you. I cannot wait to watch you step your way through the phases of life, to discover the wonders of this world, and to experience the small joys that can make life so amazing. It will be an honor to one day meet the men you will ultimately become. Don't grow up too fast though I need to see you little guys first!

                           Love you always and forever,
                                                         Aunt Kelly

Sadness

Briefly, the highlights - and lowlights - of this past week. My dislike of California and their ridiculous way of doing things (something that first began with my introduction to Kaiser at my last job) came back with a vengeance. I had the best phone call ever at work when I got to tell a mother who's been trying to get her son into Benchmark since October that we finally have a bed for him. I am vigorously enjoying my latest read 'Bottomland' by Michelle Hover. I kind of (after months of missing it) accidentally-on-purpose bought the first season of Game of Thrones on DVD (it was on sale so at least that's something). And, after a series of signs indicating that something was just not right, Synge had her first appointment with a Utah vet yesterday that culminated in a diabetes diagnosis. That last bit left me more than a little sad and with a mind that's been racing with questions, ideas, and plans on how to take care of her from now on.

Of course all of that, good and bad, pales in comparison to the news I woke up this morning. If you haven't yet heard what I'm referring to then take a deep breath and go check out NPR's website, or CNN, Huffington Post, your local TV news, any news site really. Fifty people killed last night, over fifty more in the hospital fighting for their lives; the biggest mass shooting in the history of the United States. I spent most of the morning listening to NPR's radio coverage growing more heartbroken and somber by the minute. For some reason this shooting has affected me more than the others in our country's recent history. Thinking of the nightmare those peoples families are walking through now, imagining what it must have been like for all those trapped inside that club last night, there have been many moments I've barely held back tears. I just don't understand it. I don't understand how someone's soul can hold that kind of hate. I don't understand how we as a country have come to a point where we accept devastating acts like this, that they are tolerated. You might say that we don't isn't the case, but clearly it is because we - as a whole - don't ever do anything to make them stop. Events such as todays are not going to disappear by active passiveness; they will only get bigger and worse as today's tragedy demonstrates. I won't share my exact, opinions of what I think needs to change, at least not today. If anyone feels compelled to comment on today’s post I'd appreciate it if you'd do the same.

And now I'm checking out. For the rest of the day I plan to Actively Avoid Adulthood. I might color. I might collage. I might watch and/or listen to some Harry Potter, that tends to cheer me up. I'm going to be grateful that I woke up today full of breath and peace, a luxury that was denied today to so many. I am going to focus on being full of love, for a life full of love truly is the only thing that will let your soul fly free and happy.

Remembering to be Grateful

I don't feel much like writing today. I wasn't super enthusiastic about it yesterday either, or the day before that, or all week really. In fact I feel like all of my creative energy has been zapped into oblivion, I haven't been inspired to do anything for days. This week has been a bit rough and perhaps that's the cause behind my apathy.

I've struggled this week to be ok with where I am right now, to be happy breathing Utah air. I love it's mountains, the hiking trails I've walked on, love the sense of wildness that runs beneath the earth. The people I've met have been amazing to me, but the sheer volume of people who live here is too overwhelming. Everywhere I go there are houses for miles, dozens upon dozens of apartment complexes, and big box store after big box store all reminding me that I no longer live in a small state. And while I don't at all regret my decision to leave, I miss the charm that breathed in every city in Maine. I especially, desperately miss Brunswick and have woken up dreaming of my adopted home there dozens of times since I left in October.

The last minute change to my June plans has also played a role in this weeks dysphoria. My trip to Norway has officially been rescheduled for September. I'm fairly certain that exploring Norway at that time of year will be incredible, but not going in June has brought into stark focus the fact that I am not going to be home either to witness the birth of my sisters babies and that reality is becoming increasingly hard to be ok with. In fact I'm not ok with it at all.

Those are the main reasons behind my lackluster mood there are others but taken alone they really aren't that bad. I know from past experience that after some time passes, a few days or a couple weeks, I'll be back to my cheerful self. And I know that having downs like these are just a normal part of life but of course knowing them doesn't make them suck any less when they do decide to show their faces. Now that I've shared all this (despite my zero desire to write), I'm going to end this post by doing something that often helps life my spirits when they're threatening to fall - sharing some things that I'm grateful for.

I'm grateful for Steph for her family and the wonderful way they have welcomed me to Utah. I'm grateful that both my sisters have had healthy pregnancies allowing them to enjoy this incredible moment in their lives. I'm grateful to have found a job where I feel like I make a real difference in peoples lives. I'm grateful for the quiet walk among the birds I experienced this morning at the Great Shorelands Preserve and I am so grateful that while the temperature outside is scorching not even an ounce of humidity is present. I'm grateful for the quiet afternoon I'm spending now, watching Once Upon a Time with a couple of Steph's kids, and I'm grateful that their house has AC! I'm grateful for Synge's quiet sweetness and Faelina's never-ending excitement about life. I'm grateful for who I am, grateful to know that I am loved by many people - something that so many people never have.

Well what do you know, I'm feeling better already.

A Week of Poems

Before I dive into this weeks little writing venture, I have some somewhat disappointing news to share. One of the dogs my friends in Norway have is very, very sick so my trip has been postponed. Knowing what it's like to have a pet that ill, imagining what it would be like to leave them behind for two weeks, I couldn't not agree to change the dates. I'm definitely bummed; I was pretty much packed, had picked out my hikes, and was looking forward to celebrating my birthday in a foreign country. But I get, I really do, agreeing to push the trip back is the best for everyone involved. So keep tuned for new trip dates and in the mean time - A Week of Poems. 

I kind of fell into this by accident. Last Sunday I wrote one, then another on Monday, Tuesday's came as a result of Steph's birthday and from there I just decided to write a whole weeks worth and post them. Normally if I put a poem on here I've worked on it for at least a few hours, if not days, and so feel fairly happy with what I'm sharing. That is not the case for these poems. Most were written in just minutes with little to no editing afterwards so please keep that in mind when you judge them. That being said here they are ..... 

 

A couple of months ago, I asked my Facebook family for some writing prompts. One friend suggest a poem with the word 'Embrace' in it (which is my 2016 Word of the Year). I highly doubt this was what she'd imagined and it definitely wasn't what I'd first envisioned when I first read her idea. But I think this is what happens when I read Neil Gaiman (which I was last Sunday). His worlds are full of beauty and fantastical magic, but they also contain some haunted darkness.

Embrace the darkness, defy the sun,

fly through lost forests of haunted fun

My laughter is laced, with others' fear, 

my strength built upon each new fallen tear

Embrace the darkness, defy the sun,

Evil has mastered, heroes no more will come

~~~~ 

 

  

Dictionary.com's Word of the Day inspired Monday's poem. The word was 'jimjams' which means 'extreme nervousness or jitters' and it seemed to fun a word (fun to say that is) that I couldn't not put it into a poem!

I wake from dreams filled with stuttering jimjams
My thoughts are crashing, rattling, tin cans

I can't trust my eyes, they're threatening to cry,
'cause my dreams are no longer a safe place to hide

 ~~~~

Tuesday was the birthday of Stephanie, my very best friend in the whole world. I wrote this for her which is why it's filled with references that most of you will not understand at all. 

There was Jenny and Mario - and Heather too,

Playing barbies in jail on Sunday afternoons,

Swirling tornadoes in the front yard,

'Driving' for hours in that beat up half car.

There were distances spent, first in hours - then years,

In between there were weddings, surprise visits, losses, and tears

And in that great time we threatened to fade,

but fate still fought for us, knowing that there'd come a day

Where toast was a question mark and spiderturtles roamed,

where boxes of stuffing appear mysteriously in my cupboard at home,

And then that time we 'never needed to shave'

Followed soon by me losing my debit card for a day

Whether slipping up mountains or getting burnt on a beach,

Dreaming about Ipswitch and our Fairy tree,

I can't possibly imagine a better best friend,

My Two of a Three you'll be 'till the end!

~~~~

Wednesday I did not want to be here in Utah. I wanted to be in France. I changed my desktop background at work to pictures of Paris but that just wasn't enough, so I wrote this poem. It still wasn't enough, but it helped.

Today I wish I was in France,

I'd tiptoe on the streets, then dance

my way to a Paris Café,

for foamy cappuccino days,

From there I'd skip my way to Rome,

singing all their songs of home,

and once Venice had floated by,

I'd spread my arms, breath deep and fly

Way up north to Ireland,

where magic saunters through the land,

then swim to Iceland, where volcanic flows

echo the wildness in every soul.

I'll journey then through the earth,

until I touch Antarctic dirt,

to play with penguins and skate on ice,

and delight in the freezing, clear blue skies

What will come next, I do not know,

I guess wherever feels like home,

but today I'm happy to just dance,

and tiptoe on the streets of France

~~~~

I was in bed almost asleep on Thursday when I realized I hadn't written a thing and came up with this in literally 30 seconds. It's darker than I would have thought but I credit that, again, to the Neil Gaiman's influence.

Daisies and Daffodils,

clanging hearts, singing bells,

Oh how I want to run away,

but I am forced here to stay,

to witness what I cannot take,

for if I do my soul will break...

To late, I'm left with just one thing,

the comforting kiss of the endless dream

~~~~

This was the hardest poem for me to write this week. Writing a poem about winter was a writing prompt another friend had given me when I'd asked. On Friday I decided to try doing so with a non-rhyming poem, something I struggle writing more than just about anything else. I need to do a lot of work with this before I will be even remotely satisfied with it, but at least I've got it started. 

Winter breezes call my soul but outside it's green and hot

I long for diamond's frozen ice, pine for white dewdrops to fall

My mind falls into winter woods, my footsteps crunch in snow's soft blanket

Each breath creates it's own misty swirl, breathe in, breathe out, a raven caws

I pass a cave a bears silent den, I fear her not for she's lost to dreams

The rivers wide but gives me no pause, the twisting ice I know will hold

I step on following it's twists it's turns, filled with wonder at winter's beauty

It's hot outside, green and vibrant, yet winter's breeze has filled my soul

~~~~

No big story or inspiration for this one. It is simply just the story of where I was in the world, and in my mind, yesterday evening.

Tired thoughts, quiet cats,

I'm sitting in bed listening to an NPR rap,

The fan is whirring overhead, it's softening breeze clearing my head,

Birds are flying away outside, leaving echoes of songs in their stead.

Dusk has now begun to set, but the sun is not quite gone yet,

Still I know it won't be long 'till it has sunk and the world will get,

To see the stars dancing to the moon's white song,

I could watch their beauty all night long.

 ~~~~

And that's all for now, I wish all of you a spectacular week!